Somewhere along the line, we were sold the myth of the lone heroine. The woman who does it all, asks for nothing, and rises without needing anyone. It’s a compelling story—but it’s incomplete.
Because the truth is, even the strongest among us need our people. The ones who show up when the façade cracks. Who send that “thinking of you” text just when we need it. Who remind us we’re not meant to carry it all alone.
Finding your tribe isn’t a fluffy add-on to success and wellbeing—it’s fundamental to both. In a world that often thrives on competition, comparison, and individualism, creating a community where you can be your full self is a quiet form of resistance.
What is a tribe?
Let’s be clear. We’re not talking about curated social media followers or a massive network of surface-level contacts. A tribe is your circle of trust—people who celebrate your highs, hold space for your lows, and see you as you are. They might be colleagues, family, friends, or mentors. They might even be people you meet through an online group or a shared interest who simply get it.
It’s less about numbers, more about depth.
Why it matters
Having strong social connections is not just good for the soul—it’s backed by research. According to a landmark study by Harvard University, good relationships are the strongest predictor of long-term happiness and health, even more than money or career success[^1].
And for women especially, community matters. The Australian Longitudinal Study on Women’s Health has consistently shown that women with strong social support are more likely to report better physical and mental health outcomes[^2].
But beyond health, our tribes serve as mirrors and launchpads. They reflect our worth back to us when we forget it. They challenge us, cheer for us, and hold us accountable. And they make the big stuff—career leaps, motherhood, personal growth—a little less scary.
The rise of curated community
We’re seeing a quiet but powerful shift. More women are moving away from shallow networking events and towards deeper, more meaningful spaces. From women’s circles and co-working collectives to programs like Mentor Walks, where experienced leaders walk and talk with those seeking guidance, the appetite for authentic connection is growing.
SheThrives was built on that same desire—to carve out a space where ambition meets empathy, and where women don’t have to shrink to fit in.
How to find your tribe (or build it)
Here’s the good news: if you haven’t found your people yet, it’s not too late. Community can be cultivated. Here are a few gentle steps to start:
- Reflect on what you need. Are you looking for career support, emotional nourishment, creative collaboration—or all of the above? Clarity helps you gravitate toward the right people.
- Follow your interests. Whether it’s a local book club, a professional development group, or a yoga class—shared interests are the foundation of many lasting friendships.
- Be vulnerable. Authentic connection doesn’t come from perfection. Let yourself be seen, especially in the messy bits. You’ll be surprised how many people are quietly craving the same realness.
- Give before you get. Show up for others. Listen, support, encourage. That energy has a way of circling back.
- Create the space you crave. Don’t see what you need? Create it. Start a Slack group, a monthly catch-up, or a digital circle. Community often begins with one brave person reaching out.
What if your circle needs a refresh?
Not every connection is meant to last forever. And that’s okay.
Sometimes the most empowering thing we can do is lovingly loosen ties with people who no longer align with our values or energy. Growth often means outgrowing—and that makes space for new relationships that meet us where we are now.
If your current tribe feels more draining than nourishing, it’s worth checking in. Are your boundaries respected? Do you feel safe being yourself? Do you leave interactions feeling lighter or heavier?
It’s not selfish to ask these questions—it’s self-aware.
Final thoughts
There’s an African proverb that says: “If you want to go fast, go alone. If you want to go far, go together.”
Finding your tribe won’t fix everything. But it will remind you that you're not alone. That your voice matters. That there's power in connection.
In the noise of the world, your people are the ones who tune into your frequency—and turn the volume up.
Sources:
[^1]: Waldinger, R., & Schulz, M. (2010). The Harvard Study of Adult Development.
[^2]: Brown, W. J., et al. (2015). The Australian Longitudinal Study on Women’s Health.